Welcome to the Small People Preschool
Parent Resource Center.
We've got the info you need so you don't flock up this parenting thing.
We know that parenting isn’t all graceful flamingo poses and perfect plumage, like when you’re dodging jackals or ducking questions about where chicks come from (or who that duckling belongs to). We’ve built a nest full of helpful resources so you don’t have to wing it.
Log in to see if your pipsqueak napped, played, or started a flamingo flash mob.
Your go-to guide for taming the drama and keeping things (mostly) classy.
Resources for those days when you’re one squawk away from
a flockin’ meltdown.
Looking for answers to the dreaded
“Where do babies come from?” question?
Feel free to borrow one of ours.
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Babies R Us.
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Baby Island. In Puget Sound, Washington. (It’s a real place. Google it.)
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Kinder Eggs.
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A factory in Taiwan.
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Backrubs.
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Piñatas.
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When Netflix and chill gets hot.
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Vending machines.
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A game called Hot Dogs & Tacos.
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Holding in your poop for too long.
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(Streams The Matrix) Here, watch this.
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Delivery drones.
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Kiosks in the Dutch village of Born.
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Two special ingredients: baby batter and eggs.
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Mixing Pop Rocks and soda in your stomach.
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A claw machine at Chuck E Cheese.
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Alcohol and contraception fails.
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3-D printers.
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A daring seaman ventures into the mystical Fallopian Caverns, seeking the legendary Egg of Life… and from this journey, a tiny hero is born.
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A portal to a dimension of chaos and upheaval.
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Jeff Bezos.
