Meet Jody, Small People's
Benevolent Space Overlord
Terraforming childhood since 2015.
In 2015,
she encountered
Small People Preschool,
a failing learning outpost of larval bipeds. The place was ravaged by entropy, despair, and roaming hordes of feral shrieklings. Most would have fled the
outpost, but Jody
bought it.
Jody Clute,
Her Serene Highness of the
Pre-Sapient Territories, hails
from Boisidahoara, a high-desert
planet of ochre canyons, sage-
glow plains, and stubborn life
that refuses extinction.
Boisidahoarians are a tough
breed, forever building,
breaking, and rebuilding
under twin suns that
never blink.
By 2022,
the cosmic tribunal known as First Things First upgraded the learning colony from a meager two stars to an interstellar five.
Families composed epic
ballads to honor Jody’s accomplishments.
Within 120
Terran days, she sealed the
cosmic rift of dysfunction. Her team scrubbed away the spores of mediocrity,
reconstituted the playgrounds, and recruited a
crew of adultoids versed in the science of waste-
hatch sanitation. Order now restored, the
parental-unit uprisings ceased, and the waitlist stretched to the edges of
known space.
In 2019, sensing that the planet itself could no longer contain the growth, Jody designed a new, two-story learning outpost for 184 mammalian seedlings. Armed with seven variances,
stacks of blueprints, and her father’s builder DNA, she led construction through the
Great Covid Hibernation Epoch. On April 29, 2023, the new learning node received its planetary license, and by May 1,
it was overrun with
proto-humanoids.
Upon insertion
into the Terran biosphere,
Jody studied political science
and business at the University of
Arizona, where she learned to negotiate
with bureaucrats and other lower life-
forms. She then worked in several
Terran industries, including real
estate, construction management,
and organizational alchemy. For two
decades, she built structures that
didn’t wobble, brokered peace treaties
with Arizona pencil pushers, and
mastered the dark art of logistical
sorcery, which she now uses
only for good.
Today, Jody continues her work as Benevolent Space Overlord of Small People Preschool. She remains a firm
believer that with the right mixture of structure, humor, and intergalactic grit, even
the unruliest learning colonies can be made less bitey.
10 Known Species of Small People
Shriekbeasts'
fits are often
mistaken for
tornado
sirens
Hugglers
adhere to
anything with a
heat signature
Poutlings
inflate their lower faces when
ignored
Clingons
develop gravitational bonds with chosen caretakers
Floorforagians
survive entirely on floor- based carbohydrates
TaterTotons
communicate via
grease stains
Disarraylings
are severely
allergic to order
Queryspawn:
"Why, why? Why?
Why, why, why?"
Gaitwraiths
mimic adult footsteps
to sow confusion
Excitons
seem to be on a
perpetual
sugar high
